If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the last few years, and wisdom comes with age (right?!), it’s that things that are “the thing to do” aren’t always worth doing. It could be that club drug whose name changes weekly. Or seeing an overrated movie. Or visiting a place you have no interest in seeing.
I’ve been traveling through Southeast Asia for nearly two months and started to feel guilty that I had hardly had more than a beer since we’d been here. Sammi and I have stayed in quiet hotels and guesthouses rather than some of the rowdy backpacker hostels I’d read about.
We’ve rarely stayed out past 9 pm and always wake up by 8 am, with the exception of my friend’s hen night in Bangkok. I started to wonder if I was missing out on something. So far I don’t have any pictures with buckets or in neon or me brushing up against strangers. In fact, I haven’t met too many people anyway.
Since we planned the trip around my friend’s wedding in Koh Samui, she said we could all take the ferry over to the Full Moon Party in Ko Pha Ngan a few nights beforehand. On one hand, I wanted to be able to say “I’d done it,” little more than a brag-worthy statement for the bucket list.
But was that really a good enough reason? I thought a lot about it on the morning of. I read up on what some of my friends had experienced at the massive party. It turned my stomach into knots trying to decide whether I should go or not. And if I stress that much about it, it’s probably not for me.
First, there’s the cost. Getting over there from Koh Samui would have been at least 1000 baht ($30+), with more for the rides to and from the ferry terminal on both islands. Then there’s the cost of alcohol, which is greatly inflated for the event. Then there’s the cost that bars and restaurants charge to let you use their toilets. All in all, you’re lucky to get out of there without spending 3000 baht or $100 USD.
I also didn’t want to go to the effort. We were staying in Chaweng on the eastern side of the island, so it was a good 40 minutes to the ferry terminal. Boats came back every hour, but it would take me at least an hour leaving the party before I was back in my bed. And if I’ve learned one thing about when I’m drunk and tired, it’s that when I’m done, I’m so done.
Then there’s the crime. I was told not to bring anything except for money and your hotel key. But what about pictures, I thought. How can I make others jealous of this night if I have no proof to post on my blog, Facebook or Instagram? This is what made me realize why I was considering the amateur rave turned binge fest in the first place: for the story.
I have some of the worst FOMO (fear of missing out) of anyone I know, which I was letting talk me into a situation I really had no interest in. I don’t dance. I don’t like to spend massive amounts of money on alcohol. I certainly don’t party until 7 am.
My period of staying out all night has long gone, abandoned mostly with my Charleston life. In the end, most of the group ended up bailing on the party anyways, so my worries were unwarranted. Instead I spent the night having a casual dinner, working on articles and falling asleep early.
So here’s the longwinded message from my experience of not going to the infamous Full Moon Party. Don’t do anything you don’t really want to do just because everyone else is doing it. While your mom may have been telling you about peer pressure when you were in middle school, she had a point.
Not everyone else is doing it. My friend Christine wrote a great post about her time in Southeast Asia entitled “Why backpacker heaven is my hell” well worth a read.
So far we’ve skipped backpacker favorites like tubing in Laos, partying in Sihanoukville and walking the streets of Bangkok’s Khaosan Road. I’ve already decided that my claustrophobia and lack of interest in shooting guns will keep me away from the Cu Chi tunnels in Vietnam. And you know what? That’s a liberating feeling to be able to say no to things you don’t want to do.
Alouise says
Love this post. I think it’s really easy to get FOMO and think you need to do things and go to certain places because other people have done it. I’d love to go to Thailand, but I would skip out on the full moon party too. It’s one thing to push yourself and try new things, but life’s too short to spend time forcing yourself to do something you hate.
Caroline says
Exactly. I recently read The Happiness Project and while I didn’t get that much out of it, my biggest takeaway was, just because other people like something doesn’t mean you will and vice versa.