While this year has been full of highs, I can’t lie. It’s been tough mentally. My anxiety has reared its head again during this book writing process and I haven’t dealt with it in the best of ways. I had a minor health situation and my dad had to have a major surgery, which was terrifying. We lost our sweet dog, who had been with us for almost 17 years. But there have been plenty of highs.
I’ve come to terms with my 30th birthday. I live in a constant state of comparison, wondering why my career isn’t the same as some of my colleagues, or even why my life isn’t to the same point without a marriage or kids. It’s hard not to, but I am proud of myself and what I’ve accomplished.
I took a non-traditional route to my current point. I didn’t go to journalism school, but instead minored in communications and interned at an alt-weekly. Nearly everything I’ve learned has been self-taught.
In a few months, I will be a published author, something I never thought I’d say before this age. I was able to place stories in Marriott Traveler, Fodor’s, 17 South, Atlanta Magazine, and Evening Standard Travel. I also continued work with Explore Georgia and local visitor guides. I have tried to pitch more stories this year than in previous ones with some luck, but have sort of fallen behind due to existing work and the many tasks that come with writing a book.
When it comes to my list from last year, I feel like I’ve accomplished more this year than in any previous one. I have in fact started to read more, but don’t every day (#1). All of my trips but two this year have been domestic (#3). I’ve eaten vegan more than before thanks to Trader Joe’s and inspiration from my trip to Israel (#4).
I’ve pitched a few stories and outlets that scared me, even if not all have been placed (#5). I’m only going to three conferences this year, including one that is mostly a trade show event (#6) because it’s not a great environment for me. I booked a last minute fare (#7) to Chicago with Scott’s Cheap Flights.
My health has been touch and go (#8), but I have been working out more and eating better. I do go on more walks, nearly every day (#10), thanks to my dog Bailey. I’ve gotten involved more in causes (#12), calling my representatives about issues I was passionate about and taking part in the March for Our Lives, a proud moment.
I finally took Amtrak (#14) to New Orleans and got a tattoo overseas (#15) on my trip to Nicaragua. I finished writing a book (#16), but not the one I was talking about last year. That one is still in the works. I took a first aid class (#17), got new headshots (#18), completed a reading challenge (#19), and started meditating (#20).
I finally took an ancestry test (#21). I did in fact open an IRA but since my job is feast and famine, it’s hard to keep my finances organized (#22). I cut off my hair, but not for charity since it had been color treated. I went on a writers retreat and worked on my record collection. And I kept a plant alive!
I have cut down on drinking some, but not nearly as much as still needs to be done (#2). I still use it as a way to deal with social anxiety, which isn’t healthy. I definitely have not thought any more about a relationship (#9). That’s an entire other 1,000+ word blog post… I still haven’t given blood again (#11) because of travels.
I didn’t do another Facebook Live (#13) mostly because I didn’t know what to talk about, but some friends and I started a Walking Dead fan Twitter chat (#sheriffkingwidow, in case you were wondering). I haven’t made many new friends (#23), but that’s totally my fault, and didn’t once sing in public (#24). I haven’t yet seen all the top movies and am still working on a trip to South Africa.
Here are my 31 things to do before turning 31. And in case you’d like to catch up, here are the posts from the last few years:
23 • 24 • 25 • 26 • 27 • 28 • 29 • 30
1. Start seeing a therapist regularly and stop using alcohol to manage my anxiety. This is something I’m fully aware of but have been hesitant to get help for. After this chaotic year, I’m ready to face it. This has also something that has been on my list for five years.
2. Spend more time near water. It’s restorative for me, so even if it means swimming laps in the pool, I know I’ll feel better. Cancer baby to the core.
3. Visit three new cities in the United States. I’m thinking Portland, Seattle, Phoenix, and Baltimore should be my next destinations. Any others to add to my list?
4. Visit three new states in the United States. I think I’m at about 30 states down at the moment with 20 to go. High on my list are Utah, Washington, Oregon, and Vermont.
5. Buy a house. This is pretty unrealistic at the moment based on what I’ve been offered by lenders, but I hope to earn more money this year and possibly be able to afford it.
6. Meet up with a friend once a week. It’s easy for me to let weeks pass without any sort of social contact. I’ve gone months without seeing friends. It’s time to make a better effort.
7. Cut down on spending. If I can’t increase my revenue, I should at least decrease my losses. Dining out should be limited to a few times a month and I also have no need for coffee out. I’ve also quit my coworking space to work from my local library.
8. Work for companies as well as publications. As a number of writer friends have told me, publications is not where the money is at. I’m thankful for my one monthly client, but I need at least two more like it to survive while still having time to pitch publications.
9. Pay off my credit card. I have a couple thousand still on it from big purchase over the last year or so but want to start from scratch if I get ready to buy a house.
10. Market myself in terms of social media and content work. I have a lot of random skills in terms of content development that could be making me money if I just knew how to sell it.
11. Go on another big hike or walk. The Inca Trail was a short one, but perhaps I’m ready for something longer like the Camino de Santiago.
12. Start a podcast. There are so many stories I want to tell that I sometimes have trouble finding a home for. I know it’s super trendy right now and not as easy as it sounds, but I’ll give it a go.
13. Double my income. I am not as proactive as I should be about seeking out work. I have not once made my goal of 15 pitches a month, usually sending out no more than 5.
14. Volunteer. It’s on my list every year but I generally give back in ways beyond my time. I have sourced items for Puerto Rico‘s hurricane relief efforts and am currently raising money for ADAA, an anxiety and depression non-profit.
15. Finish a scrapbook. I’ve been working on the same one from my trip to Asia since 2014…
16. Go offline more often. It can be difficult with my job, which relies on social media and Internet, but sometimes I need to get away from horrible news. To make myself feel better, I like going for a walk with my dog, watching Queer Eye or Carpool Karaoke, and going to see my friends and their kids.
17. Spend more time with my grandparents and family members, hearing their stories. This year has taught me that there’s no way to know how much time we have left. It’s important to learn about the people in your life.
18. Say yes to more. It’s easy for me to bail on plans, parties, and events that I sign up for. But it’s time to follow through instead of sitting around my house letting myself off the hook.
19. Focus on monetizing This Is My South. Caroline in the City is my outlet where I can mostly write what I’m passionate about with very few partnerships or sponsorships, with my Universal Orlando being the exception. I’d like to reach out to destinations and companies that fit in with my niche so I can pay writers.
20. Stop putting off medical necessities. I probably hadn’t been to a dentist in at least three years before my recent teeth cleaning and it showed. I have terrible insurance (and no dental or vision), but it’s one of those things that has to be done. Thankfully asking around has allowed me to find better prices.
21. Be more thoughtful about the trips I go on. I say yes to so many trips because of the story ideas, but I’m trying to shift more towards local or more heavily researched stories that involve less travel. Traveling as much as I do is exhausting. Just because I can go doesn’t mean I should.
22. Finish my memoir. A lot of it is written, but I need to go back and clean it up before taking the next steps like looking at getting it published.
23. Make self care into a routine. I tend to wait until I’m on the edge of a breakdown before taking care of myself instead of checking in and healing regularly.
24. Write what interests me, even outside my niche. I pitched a story about cults because it’s something that fascinates me, but it obviously wouldn’t be a good fit for most travel publications. It’s time to break out of my “travel writer” mindset.
25. Explore more of Georgia. I’ve covered a lot, but mostly skipped the southern part of the state that I pass through en route to Florida. I get paid to write about the state, after all! Cumberland Island is also high on the list.
26. Get outside every day, weather allowing. I’m sure I’ve said this before, but it’s super easy to spend the entire day inside because I work from home. But if I can, I need to spend at least 10 minutes in the sunshine.
27. Take a class in something that interests me. Being out of school doesn’t mean you’re done learning. It might be online or in-person.
28. Set aside time for a passion project every week. Because of my job, I spend a lot of time working on things that don’t directly contribute to my bank account. I often avoid other things because it’s not paying me. I’d like to spend some time working on my book or other creative outlets.
29. Ask for more money. If I had to say one thing that I’m terrible at in terms of work, it’s asking for money. There aren’t the traditional benchmarks like in most jobs of when to ask for a raise, so I never know when to demand more. It’s time to look at contracts as open to negotiation.
30. Find a community to get plugged into. Most of the events I go to are connected to work, but I do have so many interests outside of that. That might mean taking a cooking class or learning a new craft.
31. Embrace the next decade. Turning 30 doesn’t mean anything is over for me, but rather that new things are coming. I’m excited to wipe the slate clean and see what happens.
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